What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
Bone appetit !

Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend

What's a monster's favorite play?
Romeo and Ghouliet

What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
Boo boos

What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack?
Count Duckula

What does Tweety Bird say on Halloween?
Twick or Tweet

Where do spooks water ski?
On Lake Erie

What happened to the guy who didn't pay his exorcist?
He was repossessed

Where do mummies go for a swim?
To the Dead Sea

What's the ratio of a pumpkin's circumference to its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi

Where do ghosts buy their food?
At the ghost-ery store

Where do ghosts mail their letters?
At the ghost office

What's a ghosts favorite ride at the carnival?
The roller ghoster

When does a skeleton laugh?
When something tickles his funny bone

What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant?
Spare ribs

What do goblins mail home while on vacation?
Ghostcards

What is a ghost's favorite party game?
Hide-and-go-shriek

What do baby ghosts wear on their feet?
Boo-ties!
What did the boy ghost say to the girl ghost?
You look boo-tiful tonight

What is a ghost favorite article of clothing?
Boojeans

What does a ghost put on his cereal in the morning?
Boonanas and Booberries

What kind of roads do ghosts haunt?
Dead Ends

Who did the ghost invite to his party?
Anyone he could dig up!

What is a monster's favorite food?
Ghoul scout cookies

What did the skeleton sing while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?
Bone to be wild!

Why does Dracula consider himself a good artist?
Because he likes to draw blood!

What's a vampire's favorite candy?
A sucker
 
What do goblins and ghosts drink when they're hot and thirsty on Halloween?
Ghoul-aid!!!
 
When does a ghost have breakfast?
In the moaning.
 
What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A sand-witch
 
What do ghosts eat for dinner?
Spookgetti

What's a ghosts favorite desert?
Boo-berry pie.
 
Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
 
Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
At the casketeria. 
 
Why was the ghost such a messy eater?
Because he was always a goblin. 
 
What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae?
Whipped scream. 
 
What is a Mummie's favorite type of music?
Wrap!
 
What song does Dracula hate?
"You Are My Sunshine"
 
What type of monster really loves dance music?
The boogieman! 
 
Where does a ghost go on Saturday night?
Anywhere where he can boo-gie.
 
Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?
He had no body to dance with.
 
What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?
A boo-tie. 
 
Where did the goblin throw the football?
Over the ghoul line. 
 
What do you call a goblin who gets too close to a bonfire?
A toasty ghosty. 
 
What kind of makeup do goblins wear?
Mas-scare-a
 
Who was the most famous ghost detective?
Sherlock Moans
 
Which building does Dracula visit in New York?
The Vampire State Building. 
 
Where do most werewolves live?
Howlywood, California
 
Where do most goblins live?
North and South Scarolina
 
What do you call a little monster's parents?
Mummy and Deady
 
What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon?
Sour-puss
 
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball?
Every night he turns into a bat. 
 
What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It's a pain in the neck.
 
How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.
 
How does a girl vampire flirt?
She bats her eyes.
 
Who does Dracula get letters from?
His fang club.
 
Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
To stop his coffin.
 
Why doesn't anybody like Dracula?
He has a bat temper.
 
Why did the headless horseman go into business?
He wanted to get ahead in life.
 
Where does a ghost go on vacation?
Mali-boo.

What do you call two witches living together?
Broommates.

What do you call a witch's garage?
A broom closet. 

Why don't mummies take vacations?
They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.

Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
Because demons are a ghouls best friend
 
What do you give a vampire with a cold?
Coffin Drops!
 
Why did the vampire quit the baseball team?
They would only let him be BAT boy
 
Why didn't Dracula get married?
He never met a nice Ghoul

heh i have some, none are at all appropriate though so imma keep my mouth shut. these were pretty good though.

Happy halloween everyone.

yeah def. ill get to the second one later